I love you when you give me stuff
I love you when you're acting tough
But I love you more when you give me things
Because, hey, you're not that good at acting tough.

I love the way you buy me dinner
Because I guess it makes you thinner
Since you're not stuffing your face
Since you have to pay for me
Yeah, that makes me happy.

I love the way you say you're busy
It's so cool it makes me dizzy
I just give someone else a call
And don't have to hang out with you anymore
Not that I don't love you
But hey, we all need lives.

I love the way I never say
That I love you at all, ever.
Because I'm shy
Yes, that's why
And also because you'd stop giving me stuff
And wanting to see me when you're free
And then where would I be?

I love the way I probably don't really love you.
And how, as I'm writing this about you
Your face merges into the millions of other faces
That this is actually about
And I love how
I probably never loved
Any of these people
Except maybe when they gave me stuff.