What am I trying to do? I'm trying to revamp my stupid webpage; I've come to the stunning conclusion that, to my great dismay, I'm not even funny. Several of you may have already come to terms with your own un-funniness, but to me it's the sort of devastating revelation that strikes me once every, say, week or so and leaves me utterly paralyzed in its wake. I want to be a funny guy, but sadly, I'm not. [insert expletive here]

Given my current situation, however, my inability to crack a proper joke is hardly my primary concern. What really pisses me off is that, in just under 3 days, I will be kissing this humid little island paradise goodbye - I won't even have time to laugh at the national parade or go on a last drinking binge with my ah beng friends or tell the girl I've liked for so long that I'm madly in love with her (if I didn't get you there, well, shucks); it's all just so damn fast, you know? I'd use the phrase 'just like yesterday' somewhere around here if I were the type to use phrases like that.

I never really thought this would be a problem.